Taking Inventory of Your...Ranklements (?!) 

What is: "A complex, multi-layered emotion that has been described as a mixture of disappointment, disgust, anger and fear" (Oh My!). Some psychologists who study emotions and cognition have characterized it as a mood or secondary emotion (sure sounds primal to me, how about you?). 

In Abundance: While TP, PPE, vaccines, and other essentials have been wanting at different points throughout the past several months, we have not been short of any of the preceding feelings, which culminate in different degrees of ranklement. Also known as RESENTMENTS! Well, why didn't you just say the word in the first place, why put me through this silly guessing game -- it make me, well, annoyed, bordering on indignant, for treating me in this patronizing manner...and, after having to endure the news lately and the continued distancing, treating me this way, is like adding insult to injury!  

       All of these types of reactions, are at the same time understandable under the circumstances and examples of resentments, with underlined words denoting various elements and experiences that are associated with them. Resentments which can range from minor, 'benign' pet peeves to more major 'righteous indignation', sustained bitterness, and preoccupation with getting even, revenge. We have all had them. Some are even called for. I'm here not to help you find the "delete" button but to both raise awareness and support a healthier engagement of your personal rankelments.

Step in the Right Direction:  In 12 Step programs (a healthy way for all of us to address our larger problems, if you bother to review the material), the 4th Step involves taking an honest and comprehensive inventory of your life. Which involves a consideration of your resentments you have built up over time (for how others may have harmed you), but also your own shortcomings and how you may have in turn harmed others. Humbling.

An Illusion of Power (?): Raising the level of your resentment awareness is a healthy step toward 'recovery'. Engaging and actually letting go of your resentments, though, may burn more calories, take more effort. Part of the reason, in my vast experience now, is the illusion that people often manifest, that holding onto resentments and bitterness somehow gives them leverage over another ("I resent you...I am not going to let you off easy...I will never forgive you...I'm going to get even with you..."). An exercise in futility, it turns out, as the resentment, instead of  energizing you over the long run, instead tends to rot the vessel in which it resides. An associated psychological phenomenon is the disappointment and letdown people experience when they carry out vengeful acts, as whatever satisfaction they may derive tends to be short-lived, fleeting.

Quantity and Quality: Both the number of resentments we may be carrying forward as well as time spent brooding and ruminating about them are important metrics in determining your well-being as far as resentments are concerned, at least. And, while it is worth being upset (as I tell an eight year-old) if your best friend betrays you, they don't determine how you engage the feeling of disappointment -- only you can determine this. Finally, there are other situations and conditions (i.e., injustices, abuse, human trafficking, etc., etc.) that befall others that deserve our resentment, as well as our attention; we should all be appalled and then called  into action accordingly. 

Foibles and Fables:  So, on the way to recovery from our resentments, which requires we look at our own foibles first, I will leave you with a fable for your consideration, "The Bald Man and the Fly": A bald-headed man is bitten by a fly and, in his annoyance slaps the spot. The fly in response ridicules him, pointing out that he is only harming himself through such retaliation. The man, thinking he'll get in the last word, replies he is prepared to put up with even more discomfort if only he can destroy so vile a creature. Scorched earth? Collateral damage? Fallacy of revenge? You come up with your own interpretation. Thanks to "Aesop the fabulist", always on the ready with such creative ways to teach us how to engage such things as resentments.