Life as a (non-contact) Sport 

Super Commercials: "This is your life with contact...this is your life with no contact..." I expect that, if not during the Super Bowl today, some marketing guru will seize the idea in the near future to capitalize on the experience we have endured the last several months, as an ad campaign, most likely for a messaging app...an extension of "Reach out and touch someone" commercials aired by AT&T in the 1980's, mashed with the "This is brain...this is your brain on drugs" commercial from 1987 (featuring eggs, remember?). 

"Is There Anybody Out There?" From Pink Floyd's "Wall Live" (1980-81), a live album and a live rendition of  "The Wall" (well, not lately). As explained to us by Genius: "...in questioning whether anybody is out there, Pink begins to realize the expansiveness of his wall and the consequences of his self-imposed reclusion..."

Walled In, Out: First, there was a cessation of hugging and other forms of PDA, other than with those from our 'householders'. Then away went handshakes, to be temporarily replaced with fist bumps, which gave way to elbow touches (we used to underappreciate getting elbowed). Which sadly disappeared as well, as we all started distancing (physically) a minimum of six feet, whether situated in front, back, next to, anything adjacent ("outta my face, and away from my space!"). Now only those with a wingspan approaching a condor or an NBA center can bridge such a gap with even an elbow. Speaking of the NBA, another thing many people grew accustomed to and took for granted, which quickly became a no-no with COVID in town, was contact sports.

Social Beings:  We have all become more acutely aware of how much we miss having close, intimate contact with extended family and friends, other than that we have recently engaged in at curbside, 'porch-side', fire-side (sitting around a bonfire, more frequently these days), standing outside a window at an assisted living facility, or through a human proxy at a hospital. Studies of societies and human communities throughout history, including those in the area of social psychology in particular, remind us of the value of social contact. Other studies have also demonstrated the value of spending time with just YOU, in reflection and self-discovery (more than you might have asked for lately, but have you taken full advantage?).

Connected(?): While the advent of the internet and the number of platforms for connecting us have given us accelerated access to people throughout the world, there has been a corresponding accumulation of studies inquiring into the what types of connections contribute to (or detract from) our quality of life, including but not exclusive to such times we are otherwise restricted from gathering. As opportunities to connect with 'strangers' found their way to our youth early in the age of 'instant messaging', for example, we became concerned about some of the side effects of the internet. A particularly effective commercial (I felt) featured  a closed bedroom door, coupled with the question to parents, "How would you feel if you discovered a thousand strangers in your daughter's bedroom?" An obvious call to action, for supervision, for protection, even if she/he strenuously objects. On the other hand, an abundance of parents who otherwise viewed gaming and video chatting negatively, have conceded that during these times it may be the only way for our youths to connect, unless they are among the few who have been in the school setting (even these youths have shared with me they look forward to talking with their friends online after school, given the restrictions for 'up close' and the possibility they don't share the same 'cohort' as their close friends). 

(Dis)connected(?): We have all experienced, through both gentle and more legal persuasion, a decrease in opportunities for direct connection. We have complained loudly (from a distance and through masks!) In just about every setting we previously engaged, ranging from the workplace (where many were told even early in the pandemic "you will be working remotely indefinitely"), schools, restaurants, places of worship, sports venues, etc., etc. ...even homes of friends, neighbors, and extended family. We continue to sour on such strictures. But, is the difference between pandemic and pre-pandemic times 'more apparent than real'? Even before March of 2020, for instance, studies had sadly demonstrated that among youths in particular, where they had increasing technology to connect with a gazzilion people globally 24/7, they reported feeling more disconnected than prior generations. It is my strong impression from a wealth of experience now that this is a tacit acknowledgement that the quantity of more superficial connections don't and can't make up for a few intimate, fulfilling friendships. Couple this with the experience (not particular to any age group) that people can find refuge in texting, tweeting, etc., if they want to cast disparaging remarks they would be less inclined to standing in front of another. Speaking of 24/7, parents have (thankfully) become aware of the disruption in circadian rhythms (i.e., sleep) that phones in the bedroom pose ("how can I expect my child to manage something I would not have been able to at that age...I guess I need to restrict it at night....nothing good happens after 11 pm..."). 

Reconnecting(?): As we have realized the aggressive development and then the distribution of vaccines, and the associated gradual decrease in COVID numbers in some locales, there has been a corresponding gradual easing of restrictions for contact amongst us. In our state, contact sports were just granted the opportunity to resume, with precautionary protocols and restrictions of attendance. As we all start creeping out of our homes, still adorning masks, it will be of great interest, not to just us psychologist types, whether we will remember: a) how to effectively interact/communicate up close and personal; and b) whether what we longed for for at least a year will inspire us in sustaining intimate relationships versus self-imposed social distancing. Will the teens as well as the rest of us really turn off their phones when in the company of their friends, like so many have promised? Mea Culpa!

"We'll Meet Again": "The Wall", an incredible success for Pink Floyd in both the studio as well as when they were allowed to tour, contains a track entitled "Vera"', with excerpts from the 1939 song made famous by Vera Lynn, associated with the WW II era, resonating with soldiers deploying and their families and other loved ones. A song for our times.

BTW: "Life is a Contact Sport", a 1994 publication by Ken Kragen, a successful Hollywood agent, offers an unapologetic set of strategies for 'exploiting' your contacts while developing your career (e.g., you don't know who they know...). A book I still recommend as having value as an adjunct to the online resources in career guidance.