The Day After, and the day after that...the days to come: Our Inheritance, Your Legacy

Inheritance = a thing inherited, received from predecessors, progenitors; the genetic characteristic(s) transmitted from parents to offspring, progeny...

Legacy = amount of money or property left in a will; something handed down from an ancestor or predecessor (including nonrelative), or from the past (e.g., "freedom of speech"); an individual who is either an applicant to an educational institution or a matriculated student who is the child of an alumnus/alumna... 

Born on the 4th: A great nation, celebrations of which included many parades, flag waving, fireworks (apparently not all used up, based on the sounds in my neighborhood last night) and, of course, consuming LOTS of hot dogs (76 in the span of 10 minutes in one case). As well as this post, represented by "Coming soon: Our Inheritance, Legacy" . Two concepts, constructs that we hear almost daily, many times in tandem but other times quite distinctively (i.e., "in a way that is characteristic of a person or a thing, distinguishing itself from others"). One we have 'relatively' little control over, whereas the other we have a lot to say and more to do about...one has more to do with those who precede us (not necessarily predecease), and the latter of our descendants (even while we are still living and breathing, such as in a 'living legacy'). The incredible amount of forethought that went into the drafting of our Constitution (as well as the other cornerstone documents I referred to in the 4th post), and the subsequent sacrifices that have collectively accumulated to defend it, got me thinking about these two concepts, as they relate to the nation that we inherited, as well as that which we will pass on, as we inevitably will.

Born on, into, an Inheritance: A time, place, and 'person' (aka parents, family, community, in the latter case), realities of life we have no control over. As the old saying goes, "You can't choose your family and usually not your neighbors, but you can choose your spouse and your friends..." Frequently followed by "So make good choices!" if being issued to us by our parents. Sometimes celebrated, appreciated, grateful for these conditions we find ourselves in, whereas others a lament. In the former case, in my cumulative experience as both a psychologist and otherwise, I usually overhear individuals attempting to be grateful, humble for what they have received (including the gift of a great nation characterized by so many freedoms, for example), whereas the latter is frequently in the form of externalizing, apportioning blame for their woeful circumstances (most recently experienced when I overheard the current U.S. VP "We inherited a tough situation...", referring to the tragic, ongoing circumstances at our southern border). In either case it is a statement of not having control of the origin of the traits we have inherited, the fortune (or lack thereof, even 'mis'fortune), or other circumstances we were 'born into', literally and/or figuratively. This, in contrast to..."We must learn from our history" (VP Harris on marking Juneteenth as a national holiday), regarding...

Our Legacy, forward, left behind: "What is to become your legacy?" "What will be your epitaph?" "What will be said, as well as unsaid as a eulogy or obit?" These are questions often asked and pondered by us all, especially as people age. These profound questions and associated statements are more under our control, as well as having more potentially lasting effects than the 'stuff' we inherit. And, while we, while still among the living and breathing, might specify what part of our legacy will be in the form of words on a grave marker, crypt, or within a eulogy, as well as how financial holdings might be directed in the future, the 'true tales from the crypt' will be discovered well after you have left this time, place, and family...by what others say, do, or even not do to emulate your example you set, for example...

Trait ≠ Fate: A Matter of Distinction: Whether we are talking about physical/psychological traits we have acquired in utero, tangible things we have been bequeathed, bestowed upon us, or lessons about life that are more enduring than things, a connection and disconnection I frequently draw on behalf of the person(s) in my audience. That is, while we have little control over what we have been given, acquired, we have lots to say and do about what happens going forward. Most often made on behalf of someone who is feeling down on their luck ("If I didn't have bad luck, I'd have no luck at all"), dire straits, or challenging traits passed on. I start with acknowledging the difficult starting position but then start moving to a position of 'relative strength', one which emphasizes that they have opportunity to at least decide how to engage their circumstances, better harness or direct their traits, thereby breaking a chain, disconnecting from perhaps several generations of dysfunction...empowerment! At other times, I find myself being an advocate on behalf of not only the person in front of me but those they are potentially affecting, when they are at risk of squandering...squandering their own/inherited wealth, trust (both financial and that more valued), and good will...

Promising Future: So, are we honoring our parents', grandparents', great-great grandparents', going all the way back to 1776 -- their vision, their wish for us, our inheritance, their legacy of this nation? Are we, not just by our words but daily deeds, promising a strong future for our children, grandchildren, great-great-? It's Their Inheritance, Our Legacy...

"A good person leaves an inheritance to their children's children, but the sinner's wealth is passed to the righteous" - Proverbs 13:22