Growing up, while staying small...
Pregame Introduction: “We'll take it from here..." (OK, but have him back before nap time...)
Toddler Transport: "Here, sit in this booster seat and if you promise not to squeal..the tires I’ll let you drive…”
Waiting in line: "Mind your p's and q's in here...you do know one from the other, don't you?" (Oh, you haven't had time to develop a sense, of sarcasm yet, eh?)
Taking orders: “If you agree not to spill…the beans, you can order off the big boy menu…”
Table talk: "It says you have a degree in finance…not sure a lemonade stand qualifies…may have to fudge, a bit…”
Sign of the times: "Just make an X here, on the napkin to show you agree to our terms..."
Many happy returns: "Take my hand and don't talk to strangers...other agents in particular" (this being a preschool and all)
Peer-to-peer” So, how did you make out on your takeout? Oh, had to tip the waiter to act like I had not been there twice before…this week. And a little extra bought me a little more “pop!” in my soda…
Post nap: “Hurry honey, as your car and driver's waiting - wouldn’t accept my written excuses…no more bellyaching, and oh, no recess for today…it’s all practice from here on in"๐ข
Strong comeback: "Tell him to come back later, that I'm already under contract, with Gerber, baby"๐
Free for lunch? Turns out it's not so free, after all, once you sign on. All those unseen, not-so-up-front costs, terms and conditions, otherwise known as "contractual obligations"
Parental Guidance (calling for): When I hear, in the future, “There ought to be a law against this” I’ll remind them it pre-existed the signing day, the day we all signed on to this child version of NIL - it’s called “predatory lending practices” You think growing up in an age of communism was bad, wait to see what happens when we lend out our children to all these agents…who caught us all napping. "Time to wake up parents!"
"Welcome to the new age"๐(as put to us by "Imagine Dragons" in 2012, when none of these youngsters had even begun to...)
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