College...binding with joy! 

Early admission...assuming submission, as in signing what in the business world, is a "no compete" clause…put other colleges on pause…

Welcomed as a scholar...complete with a collar...as in restraints (on what in other settings is called "free speech") …whole laundry list of things we can no longer say (“bunch of stuffed shirts won’t even allow us to have panty raids anymore…!”😫)

Not athletic? How pathetic, as you'll have to make it on merit, and without options to go through a transfer portal, otherwise decommit...

A brand knew e-quation...for branding our alma mater...one that allows for early admittance and with the new in-tuition, leaving you with what in money terms, a pittance...(AKA a small amount...as in a weakly allowance😞)

In short form: Come grats!💰 (“a bunch of brats…this batch is the wurst !” 😝) 


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