Viral Vicissitudes

The roar restored, by some inanimate objects 😕 Where the tires hit the road… otherwise experienced by those who run in the opposite direction, as road noise. Whereas fans in the stands…clamor to be down, in the pits.  Pulling out all the stops… which allows these Grand Prix drivers hit speeds that exceed the local limits. Roadside stands… which could provide some relief to the pure racing fans, who have been standing and waiting for a long time - - given that the last Pontiac Grand Prix rolled off the assembly line in 2008 and Pontiac as a destination lies about 30 miles northwest of the Detroit city streets, where the action will take place, just hours from now. The speeds and sounds will likely electrify the crowd, which itself will be buzzing with rumors that Grand Prix in the future will be a place of peace and quiet, given the motor trends to being less dependent on fossilized fuels, being energized from our local grid (good thing one of the sponsors is DTE, who will "get th...

Going the last mile... Puts a smile on my face... As I'm the one that puts the final stamp of approval... Forever yours...  USPS... we're still here, after all the years of pushing it to the city limits...and beyond, to the places that rurally see a truck, or car, from DHL eCommerce, for example. Only one of a few that have contracted with the United States Postal Service, to take the package, off the rack, or even take it back, on occasion. Going what's come to be known as he "extra mile" but can actually cover a few more than that, as in the last leg, in a marathon journey. Just when you thought the USPS was on its last leg. Never count U.S. out, as you hardly notice us being out, in the cold and snow..."Neither snow, rain, nor budget constraints..." goes the updated slogan.

Forget about Fouchy, a precautionary about the new pouchy   "Just a pinch between..." came the original smokeless solution, that will last you the whole day...and could, as it turns out, create a hole in your numb Skoal. Here comes yet another gimmick to sustain our "young uns" (or whatever age range you include in the Gen Z group) that have been buying into the caffeinated variety. Which can easily be confused with Z-paks, which are, by design, assembled to pack a punch, to knock out whatever (bacterial infection) might be ailing you (Zithromax, in brief, but properly pronounced Azithromycin by the pharmacist who has to have a hand in it, given its prescribed nature). But even the best of circumstances, come with warnings about potential side effects, among which "stomach pains...diarrhea! and/or rapid heart rate, flutters, and progressing to shortness of breath and even dizziness😟"  But who bothers to read the warnings and cautions, especially on newer ...

"Marco....Rubio𝅘𝅥𝅮" From sea to shining pool, surfaces... As in he's surfaced here, there, so many places, it's as if he's going for the nomination for being... The new chief... Zamboni driver...who froze out not only J.D. but a whole sheet of nominees. The META-phor for his drive to the next destination in D.C. (?) -- it's only trumped by what happens when you're trying to find him, in such a large pool...of weak swimmers. As in the shallow end, of the pool... Venetian blinds... as in Marco Polo the explorer, who frequently wandered the world, searching for answers and being the first dude... to refuse to stop for directions, needed to be called repeatedly...it's as good a theory as any as in how this pool party game got its name. Which is only overshadowed by games of games of "chicken!" that end up with several participants ending up with "hematomas" according to the urgent care caregivers, whereas pool attendants simply caution, ...

Spangled spinoffs - is Old Glory getting Old; are we running "Out of Respect"?  Most memorable - reflections on Memorial Day. As in what do you most readily recall, in our increasingly truncated world of "moment of fame" that seem to go up in flame. Otherwise experienced as an even shorter STM. But what about traditions that have stood the test...of time, that seem to serve us, not only in times of obligation…as in “out of respect” (e.g., the annual memorial golf outing, 5K for a cause). Looking around at the empty chairs in the Reserved for Veterans section, and listening to the retired General about the pledge…to not leave anyone behind, on the eve of our 250th, I began reflecting on how, whether one believes we are still in our infancy or past our prime, what we can all relate to at both ends of life, is the universal fear, of abandonment. As well as the reminder that “paying respects” costs nothing, but a few minutes of our time. ”Lest we forget” Respectfully Su...

From C to shining C's - Caitlin Clark Controversy Overflow of foes... a natural force of nature, as a sports figure who has become a standout in her sport, comes a rising tide of critics, that have to find something controversial to write about…”at a Fever pitch…the ride of the Valkyries…” as an example of employing both Meta-for and hyper-bully. Seems like every time she turns around, stubs her toe, there's a sports reporter in tow, sticking a hot mic in her face (“she’s not easy to cover”) 😠 But the surest sign she's the hottest commodity in sports these daze, is the rumor swirling around the 2.5 oval..."Caitlin does Indy". Fulfilling her bucket list, no doubt. And leaving no doubt as to whether she's up to the task, Caitlin...pours it on..."Driver's, start your engines!" Poor kid, can't get a brake.  Want more spin? Spangled spin-offs: "Is Old Glory aging out; out of respect?" 

Spangled, entangled in controversy Nothing knew... Patriots have been arguing since the dawn, of the American Revolution, as to how best, or even properly to carry, fly, and yes, even fold, a flag (for proper storage, which is yet another). The appearance of which seem to be 'flagging' except on the most special of occasions. Such as when we come together to commemorate those who have paid the "ultimate sacrifice" to gain, then preserve, the most basic of freedoms..."life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness". The flying of flags accompanied, of course, by the singing of the National Anthem. Whether you're going to put out your flag, or put up a banner, to be technically in line with the second to the last one, make sure its adorned with stars (aka "spangled"). Here comes the tangled part... Finial touches... And if you're going to be true to the tradition you fly it at half-mast from dawn to noon, (adorning it with black mourning ribbon ...

“Safe at Home!”  Was the call… of what’s called in the majors, the “behind home plate” umpire. As well as where they hope to end up, after taking their lumps - - “bad call...can we take up a collection to get you new glasses…?!” The “Gee” rating ones are bad enough. What about those self-inflicted…as in “dirt and grass stains!” from sliding on the infield grass or dusting off...home plate. Both done with major gusto. At the little league level, no less. This, from a person who just reached the age of voting, the votes are pouring in on behalf of this young man who has sparked a lot of controversy among those grumpy umps, who have taken most of their lumps, while simply standing and waving - - well, more specifically, if sticking to the rule book, raising their right arm, slight bend in the elbow, and making a few revolutions of the index finger, while the player is doing a single revolution around the bases (hardly a way to work up a sweat). Here comes Mr. (Sawyer) Sparks, living u...

"Back off!"    Special delivery... "Saw it from the first delivery..."  Slippery conditions... "Could make for slipped discs..." "Oh my..." aching back, of course. Why, when he pointed to his lower back we got him off the mound...as standing around could make things go from bad, to worse...(only one of the reasons our Tigers went from first, to the worst, in the divisional race)  Talking about getting sacked...   and what's called in the wide world of sports as well as wider world of work...adding insult to injury: "Great...we get to pick up the slack, while you're still in the sack..."   A natural foul-up: "fitness finesse...how umps, earn their lumps" 

Trip Tick talk  “NOW I’m REALLY ticked…!” First there was the price per gallon, that kept ticking up every time I turned my head. But not quite enough to call off our trip…then came the fuming we witnessed on TV from those who were, according to their rants and waves, driving on fumes, due to not being able to afford a tank full. Followed by the charging stations known as ATM’s coming up dry. But still, and still they were, as in "bumper to bumper" traffic, leaving early for the first long holiday weekend which, in our state, usually means a northern heading...No, not the price of gas, nor the threat of inclement weather from the few honest meteorologists. But out of the mouths of some locally trained entomologists, comes the forecast of a bumper crop of ticks. The newest specie being the Lone Star variety, which had the temerity to migrate north. While a source of annoyance, having to stay local for this Memorial Day, I'm grateful for being tipped off, and for the saving...

Boiled water alert! The main reason being... if you say a water main, you wouldn't be far off. Given that when the water breaks, all hell can break loose..."roll up your sleeves, bring a change of clothes, and call off work..." "It's boiling in here...!" is why I told you to bring a change of clothes, given that you will be either going back and forth, because you forgot to stick to the list, or, given your species, going in circles...  A major diversion... a time-tested method that was initially born...out of necessity, but became a great way to preoccupy expectant fathers, keep them well, out of the way. If boiled water alerts are here, there, and everywhere, can "Father's Day" be far behind? Not sure, given that we're the last to know.  (advance notice- FD falls on 6/21, plenty of time to get things really boiling 🥵) 

A new wave, of waivers  “Not in the least…” The primary condition under which we started to see, given that boredom is, in the ballpark, the “mother of all inventions..” When, after losing the lead, or it seems the game is out of reach, we’re not the least bit interested…turning our attention to entertaining ourselves and others in our section… From rally hats… to “tarp it off” comes a whole new bunch of fans willing to take various articles of clothing and either converting them or simply the old “shirt off my pback” routine…which is now seen routinely in many center field “bleacher bum” sections… To coming from behind… the symbolism of which, will inevitably be found in the yet to be realized “hinder binder” move that will see a lot of adjacent fans… moving to other sections… Point of Pride… “yep, I’m the proud PoP that was the first to see his potential…watching him come into the world…bass ackwards…how do you think they earned the moniker breacher bums?” 🤣 "Game over" Sa...

The signs you are on track… Assisting nurses in striking back… Signs were all around us… Well before the picket began... knew we would be well, taken care of. First off, there was the buckets of hand sanitizer, more on hand than the department of sanitation keeps at its disposal. Proceed to the upside-down water bottles, with connecting tubes, allowing for a constant flow of drips, to prevent dehydration (no need for extra nursing stations, with these traveling IV's). And the finishing touch -- the always present lanyards which, in this special case of first aid training, do double time as a tourniquet. A stab at symbolism as well, given that they were all coming out to stop, the flow, of money going out to those focused on the bottom line, to the neglect of those on the front line, of patient care (I stole this line, from a sign).  "Count your steps" May as well, to maintain health, vigor, stamina, all of which needed to continue to provide patient care, under these SHOR...

“Nothing but Nyet!” "Da" nothing else… could explain how a sellout crowd could be sold off to the highest bidder. It was bound to happen, given that you can now place bets, even on whether the “inbound pass” would end up “out” of our hands and into theirs. It was only a matter of time that offshore betting would pass the vetting process. Ending us up where we are, with yet another Russian intrusion. Where visitors, in a Cavalier manner, called it a landslide victory, while our exiting cash paying customers, who have supported these Pistons through thick and thin, declared the whole affair "dull and void"...of anything worth watching. Speaking of upsets, one has to go back to about 1917, to find something so revolting... Speaking of revolting...pre-prepping a post: "When nurses strike...back" Come back for the bloodletting. 

Wheeler Dealer Free wheeling advice… “I’ll pick up the tab, if you just give me one winning stock tip…”   Bridging, the gap... that came from Mr. Buffet stepping down from the podium, and in his time-tested style, quietly announced he is now free, for lunch...as in what's known in lunch lingo, as looking for a new partner.  Lunch time... forget the lunch part, the one that the auction winner ostensibly paid ($9,000,100) for, to lunch with Warren Buffet, as well as the Currys...who played right into their hands. That is, given that the game of Bridge requires a foursome. And the game that, along with investing in the three classes of insurance, utilities, and consumer goods, has allowed him to serve out his six-decade tenure..."the best investment in the world of time". It's what doing lunch buffet style came to be known as, to include not only flexibility, variety, social interaction and, of course, "serve yourself" (as he's too busy dealing, yet another...

“No more tooling around here”  "Rules of thumb" Where the thumbs rule... “Don’t try this at home” As I already tried and…first there was the initial wake-up call, from the handy dandy jar opener, which did nothing but…have a jarring effect on the start of my day. Followed up with “taking the gloves off” given I would not need them, according to the commercial…the “knuckle bender” to fix the door, that was perennially ajar…which not only left me, unhinged, but with bloody knuckles- won’t be doing the white glove thing for a while.   “ When things don’t budge” just give them a nudge and withstand the urge to buy those budget busting specialty tools…just call a specialist - you just might save yourself some time, effort, and, in my case, a standard co-pay at the urgent care help desk. 

A Fair Ferry Fight  Justice... Or, more to the story, "just as things, waters were starting to calm, in the Straits of..." comes more troubled waters... And, to add flair to the fare, the bridge over them. The ones that represent for us, who have become all-too-familiar with "HOMES" as the mnemonic aid to the Great Lakes, and the two of interest this morning, the ones that for us home grown Michiganders are only two of the boundary waters, that bind us together, but the two where the east meets west...at the (another home groan) geo-graphic -- 'tip of the mitt'. Collectively termed the Straits of Mackinac that, if you want cross in style, and be ferried across, go either under or past the "Might Mac" (bridge, for those who are among the unwashed) to get to "The Island" -- which to those of us who like to stop over on the way to the "UP" needs no further explanation. here comes the State of Michigan...well, more like, there they ...

The dread of red Your nose knows: that it's that time of year to protest all the things we find abhorrent, otherwise things that are "stinking up the joint" -- even giving us what Kleenex are made for (and why their manufacturers, clean up their balance sheets this time of year) -- "the sniffles" which are sufficient for what the commercials call "mild" allergens. Next step up are the OTC products but "walk, don't run" down the aisle, so the sign says, or you could have a "slip and fall" event, throw your back out (take you right out of the picket line). If that don't do it, go ahead and call a professional we like to call "allergists" but also deal with people with other airway issues. Yep, we're all talking about airing out, our grievances this time of year. But, as a protest pro-cautionary -- remember when putting nose drops in, try to hold them in as long as you can stand it. And even when, after all is sai...

Holy Net Profits Batman! Follow the (non) bouncing ball... turns out that free throws, aren't (given out) so freely. And, if so-called "awarded" ...when one player on the other team gets more at the free throw stripe than our entire team put together, it could cost us the game, if not the series. For us, from the hometown of DETROIT...BASKETBALL! we can only hope that refs figure this out and will, in the long run (the so-called "long arc of justice" on the court), as hoopster fans like to say, a "drop in the bucket" (aka "a slam dunk"), even things back out. All this from one post-game interview, from a coach who is not quick to blow the whistle..."things sure ran a-foul last game"😠🏀

Speaking of Commencement speeches Designed with "Youts" in mind... To have the new grads walk away, questioning themselves... (represented by the lighter print) “Just what, are you commencing, to do…?”  I just get done with finals and this joker starts me off with another riddle?!" "Cap and gown...why the frown?" Maybe...because it's hot as hell under here while the job market is freezing us out! "Forget your tassel, too much of a hassle?" Sick and tired of all the politics, one prof telling me right, the other simply left, in the middle of class...take it as a sign of silent protest. Know what, I think I'll just sit this one out, now that I'm thinking of it. Call me when it's time to go out, to eat (our diplomas are getting mailed, anyway, right...my instructors called me "smarty pants" for a reason)😔  “Congrats...I think?”🤔 

A Dick move, or 2... "See Dick..." "See him run, revolve, around the sun 100 times..."    "See and hear what keeps him going..." (Besides having married a woman half, his age) As well as what NOT to do that could subtract years... "Never keep hate...in your heart, and never, NEVER, stop singing...the combination of which can be found in a double dose of SUPER-califragilistic..."  Added advice...  that just might add on years, or at least happiness, to your life. He should know, after playing both sides in Mary Poppins - Thanks Bert, I mean the mean tightfisted banker Mr. Dawes…wrapped up in a moving tribute to Dick Van Dyke - "cheers to happiness 101!" 🍻

"What's a Mother to do?"  Bumper snicker... "If you have time to read this, you're clearly...not a Mother...given the all-encompassing roles of nurturing, guiding, and supporting her family while also seeking spiritual strength and personal growth...Moreover, they manage a wide range of tasks that keep the family running smoothly...caring from children from infancy through adulthood...essential skills...all the while providing emotional support and resolving conflicts. All this and more, I could not fit on one bumper sticker, without much daily recognition. Until, that is, of course, they need something...Mommy...mom...mother...Dear!" The perennial shout out that takes place world wide, mostly on the second Sunday in May, whereas behind closed doors it happens every few seconds.   

Trigger happy(?)   Harmed and dangerous  While on the one hand "I'm none too happy..." I am more than, happy to point out how you triggered me....  Take careful aim... before you blame, or perhaps you're the kind that prefers what the trigger-happy crowd calls the "shot gun approach" - just fire away, mention all the wrongdoers that have wronged you, and you're bound to hit the target... Taking a step back... or, if you're hanging on, to what someone said or did or, on the other hand, where you felt let down, when someone else said they would but...you just might want to spend some time, before pulling the trigger, on what's probably the most thought provoking, all absorbing, step in recovering from just about any wrongdoing. It's referred to Step 4, commonly described as "making a searching and fearless moral inventory of...ourselves" is a powerful reminder as to how, you think, on the one hand, that holding on to resentments and r...

Form fitting - "nice fit" Onefer... every occasion, whether you're coming ("just fill these out and someone will be with you shortly") or going ("please fill out this survey, easier her while your experience is still fresh"). Twofer... one deal, if you're also filling it out, assisting someone else, which may, despite looking the same, may require a few extra steps, like proving you're who you say you are, in relation to the person of interest. Donefer... as in just when you thought you were done, here comes a fresh batch..."it's part of what they call health care re-form" This is where the fit bit comes in.  

“Getting Schnockered”🍻 ! Snookered…   a real shocker (sarcastic Brit wit) - as if we didn’t see this coming, given the rise in China, of pool halls, converting table tennis tables…we’re talking about a clean slate, covered by felt. The result of which is the second youngest, as well as the second Chinese world snooker champion.  “ Put some English on it" a reference to putting some extra spin on the ball, goes back at least as far as the 19th C and attributed to the finesse of a Brit snooker, and has particular applications to a ball’s rebound. As they, from across the China Sea, corner yet another market “8 ball in the corner pocket” takes on a hole other meaning…  "No more pooling around here"  What were the odds, that this (BBC) story was followed by coverage of pub closings in the UK and the implied preference for Brits to now get schnockered, in private. Came as quite a shock.   Coming up: another shocking discovery - canaries in the cruise line

"I'll always be straight with you..." "Straight to the point... "At least point you in the right  direction, after you glanced to your left" Pretty straightforward... for a man who has been governing and otherwise driving in circles, due to the 36 roundabouts in D.C. You eventually become conditioned to it.   

Soliciting…not required - new financial times Times were when… “no soliciting” was posted on most public establishments, whereas we find ourselves in a new monetary unit, of time where, an unsolicited offer of 56B was a case of pulling all the stops in what used to be considered just for fun and games. "Welcome in" This many bucks would have to, be considered serious biz, but under these gaming conditions, could become a hostile takeover if the so-called tender offer is not accepted. As they say in the gaming business, the "GameStop here" 😕

Going to need a bigger band width... Given how many are jumping on... the band wagon, carrying the increasing number of followers, joining the throng of loyal fans, who never lost faith, in these Detroit "BASKETBALL!" Pistons, who not only had all cylinders firing, but the players, after losing sight for a game or two, finally found it (the round one with net attached to guide the ball)...and seemed to have cast a spell over the so-called "Magic" men..." and the band played on🎶  🏀😎! 

"And they're off...!"  Was all I could think... which had little to do with "Great White" bucking the trend, of allowing its jockey to jockey into position, nor the very first time a female trainer was in the running, almost rivaled by the sibling rivalry, with Ortiz and Ortiz going head to head (can you imagine what was running through theirs?)...no not even the odds makers being a bit off tempo (i.e., Golden Tempo coming in at 23-1, going away with crown). Nope, but more so, given the new betting rings, that have created a larger band width...but more so with the irony that the race that is characterized as "The most exciting two minutes in sports" was moved to the first Saturday in May "allowing for a predictable sequence int the Triple Crown series..." that has become the largest two minute warning in all of sports, due to the posting up, of so many commercials, prior to the race. On Derby daze, "post time" has become associated...

"Life's a Gamble"   Never too late, to speculate Full of Uncertainties... But one thing's for certain: "There's a sucker born every minute" - "wanna' bet?" That the quote that continues to get attributed to one of the greatest showmen - Phineas Taylor ("just call me PT for short") Barnum, actually came from...a subject of great speculation. Along with, now, that it's allowed, and the addition of Ai algorithms, you can predict....way, into the future, or even the past. Which includes trying, "against all odds" to do what legions of legends, past saints..."better call Saul" -- who made the bold prediction (in my words: "the world as you know it, could change overnight...might want to give up your worldly ways") Which has challenged other great oracles since time began. Put this together with "render under Caesar"...the most recognizable among a legion of others now...so many sports betting...

Talk about getting PIFed off… “Swing and a whiff!” Which is the best way to sum up when a duffer duffs a shot, altogether. Managing to miss the little ball, which can really tee off even a weekend golfer. But what if your LIV-lyhood counts on it?  "In the hole!" Has become the cry of the gallery, as if that little multi-dimpled sphere cares who the crowd prefers - it's as if it has a mind of its own. And now will come to be iconically represented as a donut, given the huge hole the pullout of the Public Investment Fund (courtesy of Saudi Arabia) leaves, which has become an international trend (to cut back on funding). On such things that are not paying, a dividend, except to the tour players. And to the local bars, restaurants, and various 'establishments' of the various tour stops, which stops, right here, and now.    “ Play through ” A common courtesy paid to faster players, if you’re taking too much time, takes on a hole new meaning.😫