Viral Vicissitudes

Clean Sweep! A winning combination  Who needs sleep? Not much sleeping, with all the sweeping, as these semi-professional and semi-retired sweepstake contestants contest. “You take first watch, we’ll sleep in shifts, in order to catch the stars -- such as Britney, Mariah, and Michael- now that we’re on first name basis after winning the meet and greet"... The new morning rush hour - In the form of endorphins shared with their daily brew crew as they, within the safety of their lair, uncombed hair, and the comfort of their PJ's. No time for retirement, as we get together daily and redeploy our coupon clipping skills...   Sweeping changes As in the combination of age-old sweepstakes that combine with those that are getting on, in years, to form a team of "Sweepstakes Pros" as presented in the most recent AARP Maga-Zingers... "I'm buying dinner" As in "got another winner!" Ugh,..guess that means I gotta' get out, of these PJ's...

Things are taking shape, geometrically speaking... Hypotenuse, on the loose...we're talking wild card games, after all...  Out there, on the field of play  It’s called a diamond but…depending on the right angle of the viewer...  After getting out of the (on deck) circle...  Squaring up to bunt, Rounding first base, Hard right takes you to foul…territory  Soft left gets you tagged… Out, in right field...  Touching a third (vertice), and I'm finally headed…to the Pentagon, that ballers call home (plate)😕 ⚾ Noah gets the nod… as to  how he managed, to fit a diamond inside the arc, measured in cubics** For the winning   angles, get to the park after batting practice, to watch the grounds crew put down the chalk lines (talking about homies!) Now, with DIY you can make a geo-desic dome your home... (thought I had all the angles covered, just B4 our team demo'd the law of gravity, falling out of 1st place...)  **the one, in furniture store lore, is...

Ryders*, and their cup holders  Cadres of caddies... is more like it. Some of which, sitting in the lot, come with a built-in system to direct the driver, while others that simply answer the call for "driver, don't you think?" Speaking of calling for... "Keep on..." Ducking, in the case of the homies, who have, at least in this point in this "team play" -- formatted to include "four-ball...foursomes...singles" that has left the home fans trying to direct the ball itself "In the hole!" - otherwise hoping for even a single win.   Toast of the host... "Who likes team play any way...we're all about independence!"  After party... "Hand me the putter...maybe we can beat them at our favorite pastime, miniature golf"  *This trophy cup, named after an English businessman, came out of a pairing with Reverend Wheeler, which may or not have been an inspiration for the concrete hauling company on this side of the pond bea...

Demo-cratic I deals… If you, like me... or not, as the rare case might be, are suffering from blurred vision, as to what the founding fathers had in mind, as in envisioned, after so many years and generations of self-sacrifice, that we would ever land here, in a time of "Selfies" as represented by all the I/me statements. Technically, or grammatically referred to as self-aggrandizing....promoting or even congratulating one-self for all the great deals and such. Coupled nicely with being almost blame-less....”don’t look at me…”  Visionaries... while, according to my brief search, no one individual has stepped forward to take credit for it, the idea and need for "I" drops goes back as far as the Egyptians and the Greeks. Glad somebody, other than me, thought of it.  (Fake, out… “haven’t I been telling you all along, that there’s no eye, in storm?!”) 

From floats to flotation…devices  Homecomings...and goings - getting schooled   Scolded, is more like it... "Doc, if you're going to stay relevant with our age group, try not to show...yours” Tune up tutorial... On what's in, out, terms in this new school term...in terms of... Relatability... "So, are you going out with Suzie this weekend...?" "Well, first of all, no one goes out anymore, as it's so  PC (pre-COVID for anyone that wasn't here)...and even on those rare occasions where something like Homecoming pulls us in, as in can't get let out until a parent vouches, signs a voucher...after which we can't wait to get back in...to the after party...that's where the action is...Plus, if you mean going out as in having a date, you, yourself, are so  dated...just called a plus one, that adds up to... Terms of endearment...  Hard to say, as they seem to change, not by the year anymore, but term by term... So, are You... Up to date? For a chec...

From the guy with the gavel, gravel voice - "Been a banner year"   "I'm a BIG picture guy" Don't have the time, nor do I bother with all the scientific details that come from so-called peer review and all those other journals...no one likes journalists these days anyway. "KISS off!" I'll keep it simple, since no one within the sound of my voice can stand it too long...just ban health care altogether...everyone for themselves...we'll see who's fit out there… (closed up captioned..."And, as far as your nearest panel provider goes, I suggest Home Depot") 

ABC, JK, LKL - Putting it all in Con-text "Already Been Covered" (no new material here, what did you expect...sucker!")  "Just Kidding" (was about the best form of an apology as one could expect, from such a comedic character, who might have more enlightened during his time off, having read Chapter 47 from Randy Pauch's "Last Lecture" as in "a bad apology is worse than none at all...")    "Low Key Live" (how the alphas endorse a situation that is not hot, but more tepid...luke warm, as in not quite live, given that there is usually a slight delay, in the rare case even the host needs to be censored) Bleep.  (didn't watch it but read the highlights, in text)  Tomorrow here- Health care humor - “wait till you hear…” 

From falling out of summer, springing into fall fashions  O, now IC... A holey owned, subsidiary...  from the makers of "Beach Bag Bingo..." the ones that have an imprint of B1 in between the holes, on what were last year's bougee bag fashion statement, only to be replaced by... OOFs for goofs... open, closed toe footwear, made from but what else "closed cell construction" made behind closed doors, as represented in the fashion world as "closely held" Victorian secrets. All very secretive. But what happens when the old "simplicity is elegance" (now we're talking Victorian virtues) takes center stage... As easy as 123, almost free... as the word is leaking out, that 3D printers are now in. Talk about poking holes, in the fashion industry. Cool!"

Post-Rx, on exceeding the MDA - Are you Mad?!  Free Sample… on something you can’t buy at any store but free, for the giving… A 70’s thing… as in “Seventy times seven…” A message on the minimum daily requirement. to the eventual St. Peter…leaving what, in these AD days, gives each of us a degree of band-width (the freedom to choose)… Self Directed… leaving us each to decide for ourselves as to how much capacity we have, to forgive another… A pre-Cautionary… that we got used to during CV days, as to what could happen if we stood too close to someone with this condition, or even on the rare occasion you exceeded the Maximum Daily Allowance… "Could be contagious" this thing, called forgiveness, that Erika Kirk set into motion. The rest is up to you, but has to begin with me.

  Vida Interesante ! The POS "Mother may I...?"  "Yes, you may..." Live an interesting life, what else?  Nine easy steps... A familiar game for children but is "easy and fun for kids of all ages..." Come along and play...it's what makes life worth living... Only two rules... in order to enrich your experience, whether you, yourself, get rich in the process... Rule #1  In order to not get tripped up, on your way, "don't take yourself too seriously" -- including, even when others don't appreciate your good gestures ("no good deed goes unpunished" as our mothers, and my mentor mentored me, whenever I did)... Rule #2 Which was actually taught in tandem, hardly taking a breath - "while taking your service to others seriously..." (while not always sustaining, won't be a source of regret…”happy, to have been of service”)  That's   the point, of service, after all. Wanna play?

Singers and their Genus, Miracles of Lyricals Now, about the gems of their genius... Who in the… was Julio, anyways…?! The one that joined Paul, as Simon says... Going yard… ok but why the schoolyard…why not Spanish Harlem….? Where do Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters actually hang out...among a legion of lyrical legends... Lacking voice... they had little choice, but to become creative, which gave way to becoming content, which is where, I imagine, the "creative content" category came from. Okay, but what about... The brains behind refrains… BRAINS ?! The repetitive nature enough to cause a ringing, in my ears. And what’s called a stinging rebuke, to theirs😠. "This song’s for you...🎵" (Lyrical lite- “The Grammys” is where many singers, finally get to meet their songwriters)

Erring our differences - “can’t take a joke?” J.K. Add-vice column to aspiring punny people  No longer funny… out of the money (versus a comedian or one who writes for one…”right on the…!”) Grating gratuitous… as in too much, in-your-face, crossing the lines of decency as well as categories - violence, sex, drugs…depicted by the reality show “The Wolf of Wallstreet” (guessing there was something worth waiting for, but I didn’t stay up for it)… Historical hysterical… good humor and good taste always has been, is, will be, by product of good timing and knowing your audience. Ranging from those who engage in self-effacing (think Rodney, "I don't get no respect" Dangerfield), to one who called people inanimate objects (when Don Rickles came to a roast, everyone got fried..."you hockey puck!") to one whose humor was so sophisticated and nuanced, that it required (at least for me) to have a Webster's along with a Thesaurus on hand  -- of course, I'm referring ...

Suspended animators, defending the artists  Held, in reserve...  otherwise, in school lingo..."in detention..." (until we can figure out what to do with this miss-crayont)  Natural out-come...  of what happens when you sent home a supply list, not knowing what the final count was to be, the one that resulted in having to cut, the arts back... From graft to graffiti... What to do with my leftover crayons, highlighters...what else but to highlight the high cost over-runs..."where public officers are directed to purchase services or supplies well above the market place..." Found where else but the preferred canvas of the grade school graffiti artist, but the walls, of our johns..."This TP is crappy"    

“No siree Bob!”   (Absolutely not, no way, can’t be!) Man, on the move - Everyone has their favorite Robert ("You can call me Bob" off the set) Redford movie, or more specifically a scene from one. The one that remains firmly etched in my movie moment, was from "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" -- where RR played the part, playing off that of Butch (Paul Newman, another actor I sorely miss, that he was nicely paired with on more than one occasion) -- of a so-called "gunslinger". Who was trying to prove his value, beyond his natural good looks, in what he could bring to the "gang" of outlaws. That's pretty much the set-up, For when he was put on the spot, he couldn't, as the expert six shooters call it, "hit the side of the barn" while standing still but following his famous line (which became my mantra given my natural...restlessness) "Can I move?" became a sure shooter as he, himself, went into a barrel roll. Alway...

See you at the Glam opening! Where we’ll be glamming and jamming  Let’s get “Ziggy with it” ! Just need a little Stardust to get there…along with some dude who answers to “Major Tom”…  Accessorizing, riches of niches...  A definite cross dresser was he, not just because of the many genres and musical niches he crossed...from art, to pop, electronic...on to glam...But the cast of characters he played... Spell bound... From the moment she saw him casted as the Goblin King, even before she became smitten with his distinctive voice (“what kind of magic spell to use…?🎵”) our own preschooler became bound and determined to correctly spell one of the things he became aligned with. Now, she'll find herself not only among a huge throng of other fans, who are making their way to the Victoria and Albert Museum, but have to wind her way, pick through the 90,000 archives, that collectively make for a virtual "L-A-B-Y-R-I-N-T-H” David Bowie Collection - Simply   Glamorous!   ...

A Weak Showing... Overflowing Only a week in...  well beyond "welcome week" way before "count day" (#1) and already the weaknesses are showing...of what you did not  do this summer. This, based on what the educators call "baseline" testing, which might even be standardized... The (not-so-great) reveal... or what's termed, in most performance settings, as "sub standard" performance levels... Opposing forces... As pools are draining, and classrooms are filling up..."If more of you don't start showing up, we'll have to shutter." A familiar ring, after our pools had restricted hours…along with "90% of the job is showing up" And why, even just a week into the school year, the students come home with the daily report..."we had another sub today".   School Staffing Solutions - "We're in a state of school readiness, when yours aren't"

(Please…) “Don’t make this house my (permanent) home…”   Curbed appeal, lost its feel…  As in it’s lost on me, as I feel lost here, myself... Elder hostel… More like hostile, if you ask us..."bunch of cranky oldsters all staying in one place" Nice house, no body home… At least no one's answering...as most, who are able, are out of their rooms, trying to figure out a way out...so much for "you'll feel at home here, may just take a while..." Going home... Until we all get. as the Good Book calls it, "called home" hope we can hang out, in the house... Refused the “facility” So they brought me “Home Instead” - in home care by some I never met… Elder care... Taking care of our elderly, "Compassionate care for Seniors" might, itself, be getting old, if you bother to ask them... There's just no place quite like home... And being among family, friends.  Some Sun-day reflections on behalf of the elderly and all the millions out there who are d...

Who wins. with digital twins?  You and Me, Both… These, too, are putting lots of things in Jeopardy… Leaving more answers, than questions... as in "Double J"  “Hallmark and their writers” as in doubling the cost to couples for adding to invites “Plus Two” “Computers and their consumers” as in two Brothers, from the same mother, board… “Mere images- what you staring at?!”  as in “You tell me and we’ll both know…  "Sure ain't the chickens, who have already taken a licking..." as in going from "a chicken in every pot." to "winner, winner...too many mouths to feed"😟 Comedians double down … the old wise-crack about cracks…"everyone's got second opinions...they’re like butt cheeks...”😂 Speaking out, about opinions ...can always count on RFK, J to weigh in..."No problem, just half the dose"

The “fix” is (not, no way, no how…) in! “I’m plumb out…” ran out of options as my toilet bowl hath…”runneth over…” Only option is to call a plumber...talking about… Cost over runs… putting the 10k$ toilet seat down or aside, the true costs of running a household are far, from what economists call “fixed” …given the rising costs of keeping the water running…the inflationary pressure on our eroding incomes (now I get why they taught us it’s one of the must powerful forces of nature)… “If it’s not broken…” Even if it is…might not be able to go…beyond DIY…”says right here to keep things in balance, or even to find what depths you having to go to… to run…a plumb line” (talking bottom...dollar here) This fix, is gonna' break me... From our House to the halls of Congress - “why don’t you just continue to stay and play…aka recessed, what you are best at, instead of busting our budget?!” Funny money fix fact (did you ever notice that experienced plumbers, are more than willing to listen to ...

This space, left intentionally blank Blank spaces...empty seats, flags half flown, solo pilots breaking from formation, one horse without a rider... Powerful reminders...especially when words fail to express the condition we find ourselves in...  

“No joke, bloke!” Polish put downs…   “For the first time in history…” Began the latest gaffe, laugh..."The poles managed to shoot down a Russian drone..." Implying that those millions prior had managed to miss their mark. A grin reminder that even when put in plain (Queen's) English, their Brit humor, frequently misses the mark, with me. Perhaps it's simply, over my head... Jeers,

Brace Yourselves - Multiplexing  Know, not… Just the usual fare of “spoiler alert!” which could easily spoil the rest of the show. And not the application of “signal involving simultaneous transmission…” which would be partly right, and adjectively speaking…”many elements in a complex relationship…” But, given the multiple roles he fulfilled, as a husband, father, along with being an English musician, singer, songwriter, founder, vocalist, and keyboardist...characterized as the band's "only constant member" may the following title of the eulogistic statement, be a constant reminder of a life, well lived..."The Laddie is a Supertramp" Marking and mourning the loss of Rick Davies. 

  I am late, IM late, for an important date, LOL - putting Monday Moaning traffic jams in con-texts   Lots of Love… TG, I’m praying so…that they will understand, it was not on me (no way, now how)... Lotta Laughs… Gotta, or else I’d cry…LLL...!!! LOTS and Lots of   #%*€! Lights… None of which have gone my way, as in turning yellow, then on to red - was feeling mellow, now full of dread... Going in circles...   BT, DT…as in Yeah…been there, done that, played the fool, by going around and around the traffic circle…"where it stops, nobody knows..."  DTK… that I have somewhere to get to…people are depending on...all about ME...MMM! Perhaps, perchance, (mis)perception… after calling home for the third time, complaining that "well, now it appears there's TEN  thousand idiots driving the wrong way…!” Putting it in reverse...maybe, just maybe... I'm the one, guilty of distracted driving... IMing !"😕

Sending out an SIS..."Give me Moore!" A call out... to keep the so-called head of the class, home, as in "stay in...no bother to call, let alone show..." Don't ask, don't (show)... and never, never  let on, as to why, you got suspended... Call for a role reversal... which he'll have to do after being what in football, called "sidelined" from the comfort of an easy chair which, after yesterday's outcome, is anything but... Students of the blame game... "plenty to go around..." Who usually play out as Monday morning QB's like to do so, without distractions, in the place set aside to view it...the "game room" -- much preferred to the in school version, the so-called "hall of shame" room, where students serve their detentions... Self-serve... not only the cafeterias these school daze, but the new, updated version of the NCAA self-imposed sanctions for sideline infractions..."if staying at home, watching ca...

Facing the fake-out of Facebook...a second look. Family friendly... hardly, as my daughter pointed out, early on..."Facebook, ruining one American family at a time..." Due not only to its content, but the amount of time she read the average person spends viewing others...leading oddly, to state of discontentment. But also, the long-held belief, what our mothers passed down as sage advice..."you can't tell a (face) book by its cover..." Given what they may be trying to cover up, with all the "Two-faced...photo-shopped....cropped out covers !" Well, that's not word-for-word what she said, but it's the experience one can take away, after discovering...the contrast when you meet them, outside, or what these daze, is being touted as "real time"... Time to turn the page... as in history, the day that Facebook, due to the level of our endorsements, got made into a musical… Overheard, on the streets of Broadway “…if you can fake it there you ...

Genetic Make-up (face of the future) Worth a try…  already tried all the other cosmetic lines to cover my natural ones…it’s what’s showing these days in order to fill in, cover up, or even draw some additional ones…anything to distract them from seeing the real Me...calling on the talents of the "cosmos", for short... Down, on the pharm… more like back, at the lab of all those rats are running around all night to come up with new solutions, so a new, improved…You can come out hardly noticed, in the light of day… Slippery slide… “just spit a spot…” For your saliva tells us all we need…to determine your best combo of fake, I mean make-up…calling in the branch of slide specialists known as "histologists"... Complimentary tones… the (not-so-obvious) desired outcome…”That hue, becomes You…” a call-out from what one of our grandies envisioned, a future as a "determinologist"  Age-less wondering...finally putting to rest the riddle of what accounted for some of t...

The Fall line-up, posted notes  Two minute drill… including last minute trades Coming distractions... so much to keep track of, too many choices and not enough time Where the action is... behind closed doors, before it (the class roster) is posted on the front doors, after all the shouting and shoving was caught...off camera...a few weeks before the students are seen jostling for position, to be at the front (in my case at the back, to max out time on the playground)...the scene played out, where the true traders can be found, where every September "generates uncertainty" (according to the WSJ), the place where at least for the time being, the name itself is misleading...where every fall winners and losers are decided, on the floor of the “Teachers Lounge” (if they look like they've been up all night when you first meet, greet them, now you’ll know why)  

One, for the record books, court records  Keeping 45's alive... as in playing singles (while arguably could be looked at as a double take, depending on what's on the "B" side) - even mixed doubles on occasion (not counting the double dates she has had with her sister and her playing partner)... LP's for short... abbreviated only for convenience, given the Long-Playing nature of this "Queen of tennis"... Age-less wonder... whose nearest rival, most of whose cases have been settled out-of-court, currently resides 249 miles southwest of Flushing Meadows… The hits just keep on coming! from both sides of the net, from the baseline, even when she's been sidelined at the U.S. Open..."She's got it...yeah baby she's (still) got it...I'm your Venus...I'm your fire..." It's as if the Shocking Blue as far back as 1969 knew it, would be their biggest hit, when they scored the music to "Venus" (we novices learned early on no...

Slackers, hackers, and scratchers... "Let it out...give me some..." Slack, of course, allowing me a degree of flexibility... "Take it in..."   As in "...pulling the tail end with one, while grabbing the other end near the belay device, with the other..." Too much of one, not enough of the other, could end up a rough landing...Speaking of devices and their delays... "Hand it over..." The ransom, and its ware, where the latter results in less data lost...as well as lost time, down to your last dime ("I don't negotiate with hackers!")...and in schools..."no phone zone" "Scratch!" In sports, is also known as a "no-show" whereas in the new era of funding our schools...has us calling on fools, to buy scratch-offs, and other lottery tickets...5$ giving you 36.36 chance of winning, while 20$ gets you up (I mean down) to 22.26, with approximately 28% of the profits going to the "School Aid Fund" the si...

I’m resigned, to stop stroking… At least, for the near future… out of doors, now looking inside, beside myself... Forced to quit… seeing   so many "no stroking" signs... Quit pooling around… just quit, once and for all..."no running on deck!" Doc says I’ve got nine months… (aka a pregnant pause)  -  only makes sense it begins on Labor Day... the day the pool will close, for the season. 😞